Puppet in God's hand...

Why do i plunge into this temptation?
When I get only the worse on earth
Why do Im tortured by this nightmare?
Thinking the happy dream’s my worth!

Am I a curse to this world?
Bombarded by the sorrows
Dint life teach me enuff?
Or the lessons I learned r slow?

Being once the victim to the best
Serving even my skin to kid n kin
Smiling to every odds
While dying new deaths within

Not born an orphan in this birth
Considering the dear ones beside
Wanting to abscond somewhere
But their love I fail to hide!